It’s Been Five years since the murder of George Floyd and White People Are Still the Worst

And I Always Have to Say This But Not All White People…

May 25, 2020 America changed forever. Well, for a couple years. I call it the Summer of Allyship in my book (chapter 4) where white folks learned, for what felt like the first time, that police willingly murder Black people. That lynching was a regular occurance. And that George Floyd, a Black man, called for his mother before Derek Chauvin, a white cop, literally took Mr. Floyd’s last breath. With the pandemic trapping privileged white people in their homes and in their thoughts they, for once, had to sit in the discomfort of reality of knowing what Black life in America included; murder by those who claim to serve and protect.

June 2020 was when white people started to learn that their experience with law enforcement is different from Black people and Juneteenth was the way to express those new, awkward, confusing yet determined feelings. Juneteenth. What was it? How was it not a holiday at work in 2020? Okay, next year we as a company will have the holiday. But is it like Cinco de Mayo? Wait, as a white person can I celebrate the freedom of Black people?

White people wanted to not be racist.

I mean I’ve been conditioned to celebrate the Fourth of July when my ancestors were not free so what did that make me? I always knew how important Juneteenth was celebrating it with my family, especially my grandfather who took me to Juneteenth events in my hometown of Sacramento, California. But, now white people are still figuring out how to celebrate Juneteenth. Like, why is it hard to celebrate Black people’s freedom? My freedom?

Is it because white folks feel like the comments I received when talking about the five year anniversary, the remembrance of George Floyd? Did Mr.Floyd's life not have value? Was he not born from a mother and have the honor of being a father? Do Black people deserve more police brutality? Do white people Black Lives Matter only on a sign in their window or on their lawn?

The Summer of 2020 white people wanted you to know that it all mattered. Well, not “All Lives or Blue Lives” because they learned that was racist, but BLACK lives mattered. They donated to bail organizations. The ACLU. The NAACP. The Southern Poverty Law Center. White people bought Black. They demanded that their favorite brands be transparent with their staff and leadership demographics. They wanted to see Target and Walmart sell Black products (remember Juneteenth ice cream). White people wanted to feel good in the America they did not know; Black America. Black America was new and white people wanted it to feel like the good old days, I mean, like it wasn’t something they didn’t know.

White people wanted to be experts in Black America.

So they hired me, my firm, my brand, my image to help them not be racist. To be experts in Black culture. To fix or start their DEI department. To help them hire Black people. To help white people partner with Black people to feel good about the America they did not know anything about. To buy my merch. Collaborate on merch. Write about me. They wanted to be held accountable so that a “George Floyd” situation would not happen on their watch. Never again. They wanted to hear what I had to say. And follow me.

They wanted to be allies.

The Nudge collaborated with me to create the Ally Nudge and overnight thousands of white people were learning how to be an ally from me. White people wanted to be called in to learn and unlearn. To be the complete opposite of the white cop who took a Black life. They wanted to be a good white person. As the years went by white people wanted to be comfortable again. They no longer wanted to be comfortable being uncomfortable. You know, the thing Black people are all the time, uncomfortable. It was all too much. They had done their part.

White people wanted things to go back to normal.

But as a Black disabled woman, things were never normal for me. Normal is where racism, sexism and ableism live. Today, five years later, I have laid off all my staff. The very team of folks I needed to meet the demand of the racial reckoning. Gone are the days of having a flourishing business where money was never anything I had to seek out and fight for. It was almost as if the time following murder of George Floyd was what it would be like if I were a white man or woman running a consulting firm; not trying hard, money at my feet, endless demand, pick of the litter situations.

From 2020-2022/23-ish I was experiencing what it was like to be a white business owner.

Was my success at that time performative? Not to me, but ultimately it was. Was I only needed because brands and white people only wanted to feel good about themselves? Unfortunately, yes. Today, as I reflect on the five years since that dark day, I can only think that it was all rooted in centering white people. Their comfort. Their change. Their commitment to Black lives. Now, incredible things have happened with the amount of money that went into the Black community, businesses, influencers, celebrities and brands, but where is it today?

Where are the white allies?

Where are the white people who paid me so much money to do better? Where are the brands who remain committed to all the DEI initiatives they started after Mr. Floyd was murdered. Where are the people who do not want to be remotely viewed as racist? Some of those very people shopping Black-owned products at Target voted for Donald Trump. Some of them voted for Kamala Harris and said there is nothing more they can do. Some have said “we got through Donald Trump before.” Others are still shopping at Target amongst a national boycott.

When I post about George Floyd today I lose followers on social media, get an onslaught of misinformed racist hate, and celebration that he was murdered. White people, the ones who reckoned then recommitted to racism or worse; doing nothing. The “there is nothing more they can do” white folks. As if it was a new fitness class that didn’t give them the results they wanted right away with committing to the full month package.

Most white people do not want to do the work.

Here’s the thing. Police brutality has only increased since the murder of Mr. Floyd. Those protests, the Summer of Allyship, were the largest protests since the Civil Rights Movement and here we are, four summers removed from doing the work and my life, Black lives still don’t matter. There has been considerable investment in law enforcement to end and reduce police brutality since May 2020, but the rates of harm increase, regularly. Steadily. Paired with the end of DEI leaders, initiatives, programs, funds, grants, collaborations and opportunities, many Black owned businesses like myself are struggling.

But hey, as Black people our struggle has always been consent right.